Stronger woman

So I couldnt keep up the no talking, my willpower deteriorated, but I reasoned that it was ok to talk to him if all I was trying to salvage was the friendship. So yes, I sent him a message, and no I dont know how he reacted, I dont know what hes going through, but I left it up to him. I said that I missed my friend, but did not beg for contact, instead I just told him that he knew how to get a hold of me. I have no control over his talking to me and I dont know what hes going through, but I am working on rewrking my ideas of whats going on. Yes he was scared of forcing me into something or hurting me, but I think at this point we have crossed that bridge, and the question is whether or not we ARE actually friends, and if we are I guess we are still on a hiatus. And I dont know whats going on, but I work hard to live life with no regrets, and I think that I would have regreted NOT reaching out and saying "hey I am ready to talk again when you are". So thats where things are now. Have I messed something up? I dont know, but then again it doesnt really matter.