Theres a difference this time

So, I text him. Said that I knew we hadnt talked in almost 5 months (today would have been the 5 month mark exactly)and I knew that it was on me, but I was thinking of him and I hope he was doing well. Since he didnt respond to the facebook message, I didnt figure he would respond to this either, and I was ok with that, mostly.
But he responded. And apparently he didnt get the message until last week, because his mom had read it.
Anyway.
Why did I make contact? What makes it different this time?
Ever had an addiction? You can give it up and the first couple of days its not so bad, and you even go through periods of time in which you dont care about it at all. And then you hit a wave of longing. Yea, this was one of those waves. And I lived with it for almost 2 weeks before I did anything about it. So what made me do something? Well, I looked deeply in my heart and soul. And I wrote down things that I thought of, all the questions that came to mind. Why him, why now, what if this happens, or even that?
And I decided that being in contact with him was healthy for me. I miss his friendship because he's not connected to the rest of my friends and in some ways he is a breath of fresh air. AND this time, this friendship will happen on my terms. I made the first contact to show that I guess I was ready to have him back in my life. But if he wants to be in my life, than he gets to make the effort. If he wants to hang out, he can make the contact, and I get to choose whether or not I am free, or want to see him. We are friends, and there is no need to over think anything that happens.
OK, so I'm not perfect.
And I am slightly over thinking the reasons behind this "couple of hours" long conversation that he wants to have because he doesnt want to "rush anything" but, I mean, things happen.
I just gotta keep telling myself, that I am in charge here, and I've done it once- ok so really its been more like 3 times, and I CAN live without him (and I pretty much do live without him 6 months out of the year).

Moral of the story: I did some soul searching before I decided to let him back in my life. Now, we just have to wait and see how it works this time!

(I think I might understand why people have on-again, off-again relationships. Before I always thought it was very stupid!)