Its been another year

Its not quite the 14th, yet, but I wanted to start on my yearly reflection on my grandmas death.
(Jeez that sounds morbid.)
Anyway, this year the  14th means more than just the anniversary of the burial of my grandma. It would have been G and my anniversary. Dont laugh. Ok, yea its a little weird, but anyway...
Last year on the 14th I went to G's apartment and I went on my first ever real honest to goodness date. It was wonderful. G and I had our little thing that kind of fizzled, then we didnt talk much, then we had embarrassing drunken texts and then we talked less, then we saw each other at a party and spent most of that evening chatting and we saw each other 4 more times over the course of 2 months-ish and now we are back to talking quite frequently. Usually I initiate conversation, which is fine, I dont obsess over it as much as I did last year because the meaning is different. G is my friend, he is a person who I can vent to about whatever is going on in my life, and for that I am grateful- SO GRATEFUL. But I can also tell him the most random crazy stuff and hes cool with that too. (Or so it seems- I dont want to convey thoughts in his head that may not actually be there.)
I will never forget on that first date, I told him it was the 5 year anniversary of burying my grandma (I know, not really first date material) and he looked horrified! It was actually kind of funny. And he said to me "we dont have to hang out." Which was a nice thing to say, and I appreciate the gesture, but really, what else should I do on the anniversary of my grandmas funeral? I think hanging out with someone is the perfect thing to do.
I knew then that he was going to be important in my life, but not in the way he is today. I found a person who inspired me. A person who can roll with my ups and downs. One who can take my hots and colds and still talk to me. (Now that Katy Perry song is stuck in my head.) I laugh at myself for some of the things that I've done in our friendship. For example, in March we had some interesting drunk texting. Then we barely talked. Yet, in April I was like "whats your address, want some postcards from foreign places." He was like "hell yea" and I sent him more postcards than I sent my family. WTF? haha. While I was on my trip I talked to him, more than I talked to anyone else, other than my family and the person I was traveling with. It was like I knew he would respond, and that was comforting, because it was a bit of home while I was away. And he had weird hours but I knew he would respond when he had the chance.
September 14* will always be the day that I buried my grandma and thus a time I will always remember her. But thanks to the last September 14th, it will also be a time when I remember just how much life is left, whats good in life and how to move forward. I needed to go on that date to move forward and make September 14 something more than it was, dwelling on the past, even in a positive manner, isn't necessarily the best thing to do.
I think that my grandma would be proud of me, of the person I am becoming. I am in a totally different place this year than I was last year and next year will also be completely different, but thats the beauty about life, it doesnt stand still. Life changes, you change and things evolve.
I was working at an accounting firm, now I am finishing the prerequisites for vet school. I started a relationship last September 14th and today its not the relationship I thought I was getting into, its a relationship that helps me grow. G is a one in a million kind of person and I'm lucky to have him as my friend.

*I realized/found out that we actually buried her on the 15, but the 14th will always be more important to me and I think I will continue to remember her on the 14th- its a little less morbid.

Bigger than one person

My life, its more than just me. I have a village that surrounds me, picks me up and rallies for me. I have people here and there and everywhere who believe in me, sometimes more than I believe in myself.
I am lucky.
I am happy.
And while I am facing one of the biggest challenges of my life, I know that no matter what happens, I will succeed.
I may trip and fall on my knees or even flat on my face, but someone will laugh at me and then help me up.
I would do the same for the lot of my believers.
Because in life we dont just believe our spirituality or our God or what-not.
We believe in each other and its that belief that makes the world a better place.
You believe in me and I believe in you.
You tell me secrets and Ill divulge mine to you.
You tell me your greatest fears and I'll help you fight them.
My life easily touches a dozen people but I think, really it touches more, not necessarily directly.
Its like a ripple. I made a change and maybe I inspired another person to make a change, and she inspired another who inspired another, my initial ripple is therefore never ending. What an amazing feeling. I helped me but I helped another person who helped another person.
So, you see
my life is bigger than just me.
My life, my decisions, my actions, they encompass so much more.
And thats something that resonates through me, right to my core.

Thank you, each and every person who is in my life. I am learning to appreciate each of you for your individual contributions to my life, my world, your world.