Acting the part

Fascinating, terrifying, completely debilitating.
Those are the words that I have chosen to describe what happened to me today.
But I didnt have the time or the ability to react at the moment of the event.
Here, perhaps you would like to be clued in as to what I am talking about.
Today, I was holding a cat- which seemed to be nice, for my mom so that she could anesthetize a cat for a routine surgery.
The cat freaked, I mean F-R-E-A-K-E-D.
I can usually handle cats, even cats that explode... Once I have a good hold on a cat, they arent going anywhere.
But instead of exploding out and away from us, this cat did its very best to explode in and turned its full attention to us.
In other words, this cat twisted and turned and did its very best to bite the hell out of my hand. It didnt succeed.
But it got closer than any cat has before.
It scared the hell out of me.
Funny, right? I'm a vets daughter, I know the ins and outs of the veterinary world. I can do just about anything, but I am completely and wholeheartedly scared of questionable animals.
Thats right- I am generally scared- ok so maybe thats a bit harsh- I am very wary of animals that I dont know. I dont blindly reach my hand into a cage and I sometimes completely refuse to deal with mean dogs.
I am a failure.
What kind of person- I cant even define myself- cant hack one of the biggest job risks in my current business?
Any time I have a close call with getting bit or hurt, I cry.
Yep, that happened to me today.
I never let go of that cat, the cat didnt bite me, but once we stopped struggling with the cat- though I was still holding it- I lost it, started crying right then and there, thank goodness I work with my mom?
Sigh.
I know I'm not really a failure- in fact I've never been bit by an animal- or rather bit hard enough to break the skin- while working.
And the only time I've ever been seriously bit by an animal- it was my mom's friend's German Shepherd, Emily and I was about 3 or 4, maybe 5 years old.
Yet, its days like these and I feel like a failure.
Maybe its a good thing I didnt go to vet school, and instead found accounting.