It was unintentional. I didnt make a resolution. And its not like I flipped a switch and BAM it was different. But I have realized over the last couple of weeks that there have been a lot of changes in my life. And suddenly May isn't as magical in my mind as I made it out to be for the last 7 or so months. No, this is MY time.
Here are some of the changes that I have done:
-changed my name (on fb)
-changed my hair
-changed my job
-drove to Lex in the dark, by myself, for the first time, ever
-changed my mindset
-changed my life.
Unfortunately I have no control over my heart, but thats ok, I dont think much more change would go over well.
Let me explain.
Professionally I decided to go by my full given name. And then I decided that I might want to be "friends" with my co-workers but "ie" was less professional than "ica" so I made it fb official. The funny thing is that I went back to Transy the other night for a basketball game, and people called me "ie" and I was like, "what? who are you talking about?" I find it super amusing. On the other hand introducing myself as "ica" rather than "ie" is SUPER strange. Funny huh? (I thought so).
In October I went from brunette to redhead, it was amazing. I felt different as a redhead, bold, dangerous. But then I got a job, and my roots were starting to show, so I went back to brunette but it didnt totally cover the red, and so now I just feel secretly dangerous. I love it. And I told myself that I can be a seasonal redhead/brunette. Tax season= brunette (more professional) and summer/fall= redhead (fun-loving!) haha.
I graduated in May, I had the degree. That college degree that everyone says you need to land a job, and I had no job. No bites even, until September. Then 3 interviews. Then nothing. Til December. Then 2 job offers in 2 days and THEN the ok to be a substitute teacher. Talk about living in the fast lane. I always said I didnt have to accept the first offer, and that was true. I didnt have to accept it, but the first offer came from the firm that I wanted to work at. The one that I had decided in September was the place for me. I've been there 3 weeks now, and I love it. I love the people and I love the work. Hopefully tax season will be a positive experience.
I have been asked back to Transy to serve as the official bookkeeper for a game and so I went to a game to make sure I knew all the things that I would need to know. One coach greeted me with a hug, another, with a great hand shake and surprise on his face. They won, which puts them 11-1. And it was wonderful, but the price that I paid for such happiness was dealing with the drive home, in the dark, by myself; something I had never done before. There was nothing special about the drive, other than it was something that I actively avoided while I was at Transy.
As for my mindset and my life... its every little change that makes a bigger difference. I feel that, deep in my bones and therefore I believe it.
But then, comes my heart. My feelings ebb and flow, they dismiss *that person* and then they pine away for him like nothing good will ever happen to me. Its just life, it will get better, I am and will be happy. I know this, but do you know how I know this? Because of that stretch from May-December. Life sucked then. Life, in general, rocks now. And while I could drop dead tomorrow, I dont think my story is done. There's still a lot of tread left on my tires even if sometimes I feel like I'm just along for the ride! :)
Enjoy, loves.
*Update*
What I forgot to mention the other day was my room! I painted not one but two new colors... and I started the process in September, I think... but I finished painting the last wall Jan 8... you know 3 months later! :)
Anyway, my point is that I've made a lot of interesting changes in my life and though they weren't necessarily planned as momentous changes, they kind of turned out that way, and I'm not complaining, not one bit.
Life is good.
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