I am not sure if I have ever shared with you my family history. Let me revise that statement, I am not sure I have ever shared with you my family history from BOTH sides of my family. I think I may have spoken about my moms side of the family and how they fascinate me and inspire me and so on and so forth.
But have I ever really mentioned my dad's side of the family?
Well, they are rednecks. Like, pretty much as redneck as they come- I'm guessing, from stories that I have heard. Plus, I mean how can you NOT be redneck and be from Leitchfield and have twins named Roy and Stoy?
Today while eating at KFC (how fitting right?) we ran into my dads cousins daughters fathers brother... or something like that.
After which my father reminded me just how country, er, redneck his side of the family was. Really, they are car racin, horseback ridin, crotch rocket rollin, fishin, smokin, drinkin and huntin fools who may or may not have finished high school, let alone any college. And my daddy, who I love dearly, fit right in with that crowd in his late teens and early twenties. But then he became a father, and quit everything but the smokin because he had a family to provide for, and he had a rough go of it. I admire my father because of the adversity that he overcame to be the person that he is today.
Here's his life, what I know of it, in a nutshell: He is the youngest of 3, his parents got divorced when he was 13 and his dad's apartment didnt allow kids, his parents got back together a year later, then between his junior and senior year of high school they moved from Louisville to LJ and dad had to finish his last year of high school at a completely new school. In LJ his family had a horse business, my dad had a scholarship to go to ITT tech for some sort of engineering but his father said he couldnt go because of the horse business- aka if he went to college his father would sell the horses, oh, and he had to pay for any college that he wanted. He fell in love with a woman who's stepmother was named juggbutt- I dont know if thats something my dad calls the woman or if its a real name. The woman he fell in love with was kicked out of her house by her abusive father, so my dad and his parents took her in. They got married because hell they were already living together, why not. Then came a baby carriage, some infidelities, another baby carriage, a divorce, her moving back into his place because he didnt want the mother of his children to be living out of her car. This woman wouldnt go down without a fight though, so they took the custody battle all the way to the Supreme Court. Meanwhile my dad is working at a place and rising to become a computer programmer. He wins the Supreme Court battle- first man in KY to win a contested custody battle at the supreme court level. Met my mom, lost his dad, asked for my moms hand and told her to never come between him and his boys. There was a second marriage, and then 3 years and a house expansion later, a baby carriage holding little baby Jessie. Things were good, maybe even great for a while, but then health problems started popping up.
Point of that story is that my dad was a teenage alcoholic, redneck that could have easily not been a contributing member of society to a Senior Systems Analyst. He has always provided for our family and been there for pretty much every major childhood milestone for all 3 of his kids.
My brother told me this spring that he wants to make sure his kids know that he loves them. Implying that he didnt always feel loved by our father. But when I look at my dad, I think how can you not know that he loves us 3 kids without limits, no matter what, and that he would do ANYTHING for us, and has done so much to make sure that my brothers had a decent- as decent as it could be in a split home- childhood.
My mom on the other hand, had parents who were Harvard educated. Her dad fought in World War II, and was a CIA agent. Which means that my mom was born in Paris and grew up between Africa and Washington D.C. she went to the same schools as the Kennedy's and even hung out with one of them while studying abroad in Kenya. She says he was always pretty cordial. Her mother knew Charlie Wilson (think Charlie Wilson's war) was a faculty member at Georgetown College in D.C and was the daughter of a botonist that created the Tangelo and brought the Date Palm from Africa to the United States. College education is not hoped for on my mom's side of the family, it is expected- after all, my mom is a graduate of Brown and my great grandmother who was born in 1888 went to Kansas State.
I am not saying that my mom's life was easy, I am know she has had her share of struggles, I just know less about hers than my dad's because I always focus on the neat places that shes been or the neat stories that she tells.
The moral of my story tonight is that me being where I am, right here, right now, thats pretty special. Things had to line up just right for it to work. Seriously- my dad had rarely traveled before he met my mom and most definitely not out of the country, where as my mom had traveled all her life, living in several different countries. My dad's family is one of the lower middle class while my mom's family ran in the same circles as the elitist class. Who would have ever thought that their worlds would collide, and not only that, but that they would mesh well? Not my grandma, I can tell you that. My father's mother was SO worried that they wouldnt work. My mom has a doctorate degree, my father, never even finished a degree.
On my dads side of the family, as far as I can tell, I was the first one to go away to college. On my mom's, I went to college almost too close to home- Brown was 8 hours away from home and my grandma moved from California to Boston for college.
So, heres to loving someone not based on their background, but based on, well, love! :)
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